So. I had a meeting at Ryan’s school today. We spent an hour talking about his handwriting and Chris leaving and the meetings over. So of course I asked the question I was there to find out in the first place. DOES HE HAVE A SENSORY DISORDER OR NOT!?

Come to find out they didn’t do the test. It somehow wasn’t written down so occupational Therapy thought it was just a handwriting evaluation…

Why would I need OT to tell me my kid has bad handwriting? I’m not blind, I can see that. I wanted to know if he had a sensory disorder.

They’re going to extend the evaluation and find out. But we might have to wait until September for the results.

Also me and Nana caught his teacher in a flat out LIE. I’m not kidding, the woman LIED. She acted all surprised when I said his Dad was gone. She obviously didn’t know the loser left again. Then 20 minutes later she said Ryan “opened up to her” and said “my dads gone again”. Flat out lie. Nana was pissed. I would have called her out on it but I didn’t want the lady to start being mean to Ryan again.

It’s such a nice day today! The past 3 days have been freezing and rainy. Ryan made Justin jump on his trampoline with him for two hours, lol.

I’ve been slacking like crazy and I’m poor as shit at the moment. Spending way too much time playing WOW.

Justin’s still here. We started watching Band Of Brothers yesterday since he’s never seen it before.

I need to post some pics of Ryan is his karate uniform.

I forgot to mention this earlier. Justin’s coming to visit for Ryan’s birthday! He’s staying for over a month. I’m really excited. I miss him a lot. Ryan’s really excited also. Hopefully having Justin here will keep his mind off his Dad moving away a week before his birthday. I still can’t believe he couldn’t have waited until after his birthday..

Time goes by so fast! It’s hard to believe that Ryan’s going to be 7 already. He’s having his birthday party at papa Ginos. He wants to be able to cook a pizza there since it’s his favorite food in the world. lol

Sorry for not being around lately. I’ve had a really shitty weekend to be honest. For one I forgot to get my crazy meds refilled so I’ve been kind of off for a few days.

Friday night Chris came to drop Ryan off. He then told us he’s going back to California for “two months” to help MJ with her business or something. Needless to say I snapped and physically attacked him. Throwing random things at his head and throwing him out of my house. Then to make things worse my uncle thought he was hitting me because I was screaming and punched him in the face.

Ryan was understandably upset. As was I. I shouldn’t have attacked him in front of Ryan. I pretty much just lost it. Since he’s been back Ryan has been so much better. better in school, better at home. Less miserable and angry. Even his teacher said she thinks he was just depressed when his Dad was gone because he’s doing so much better in school since he’s back.

And when Chris said he was leaving again I knew all that was over. Ryan was going to fall apart again. And no matter what I do it just isn’t enough because Ryan ends up somehow shifting the blame to me every time Chris leaves. Chris was supposed to leave yesterday at 5 AM. But I guess he was here last night while I was asleep? He isn’t online now. Maybe he left today. I have to ask my grandmother when she wakes up.

I passed out around 4 pm yesterday and slept until like 5 am today.